Geeks in Vegas (Part 4)
From: lenny@aic.lockheed.com (Leonard J. Augustine)
Subject: Trip Report: Poker Geeks In Vegas 4 -LONG
Date: Sat, 1 Apr 95 01:12:55 GMT
Poker Geeks Go To Vegas (part 4)
Hitting The Links
-----------------
Sunday morning 10:00 AM
The standings, for those playing along at home:
Fish Results Sleep
Phil +$350 15.0 (had a rush at 10-20 or 20-40, then lost some back)
Tony +$300 24.0 Playing all low-limit games
Lenny +$210 12.5 Our hero is in 3rd place
Rafe -$500 14.0 Rafe's a good player - not his weekend so far
Dave -$600 12.5 He doesn't care, he just loves being in Vegas
Got up to play golf - we had an 11:08 tee time. I placed a quick $30
parlay on Massachusetts giving 3 to Oklahoma State and the over and we
were off.
This is the first time that Dave has been outside the Mirage casino/hotel
since we arrived 60 hours earlier, and he shrivels up like Dracula in
sunlight.
They kiss your butt pretty good when you play at the Mirage golf course (as
well they should when you pay $40 to play 9 holes - it's a full length 9
holes though). There was a guy waiting at the taxi to take our clubs and
put them right on carts, and the starter let us play as a fivesome.
There is a lot of wrangling at the beginning, mostly about handicaps.
Though I once shot around 92 regularly, I now am lucky to break 105.
We decide on one dollar skins which roll over, and we all have to
give Dave a 1/2 shot on every hole. I'd never golfed with Dave before
(in fact Phil was the only one I had played with before), but he was
apparently the acknowledged worst player in the group (Rafe pulled me
aside and says "don't worry about Dave, he doesn't have a snowball's
chance in hell of winning a skin"). Oh, and Dave was allowed to tee
off from the white tees, whereas the rest played from the blue (they
in fact have black tees as well, which are the real long ones).
Meanwhile, Rafe and Dave have cut a deal for half of each others
action without telling anyone else.
After 3 holes, Dave has won 2 skins, and is hitting his shots straight
as an arrow, and far enough from his advantage. Don't worry about
Dave, my ass.
Then I pull out my Breath Savers - a must in Vegas when you only get
12 1/2 hours of sleep in 4 nights. And of course everybody wants one,
but there's only one left between Dave and Rafe. I just toss it to
them, and Dave grabs it. After a quick talk about how to decide who
gets it, they decide to Ro-Sham-Bo for it (you know - Rock Paper Scissors -
our group decides each and every controversy through this method -
it's very effective.) But just before they Ro-Sham-Bo, Dave grabs the
Breath Saver, licks it, and puts it back down. 1-2-3, they're both
scissors, 1-2-3, Rafe is paper, Dave is rock, Rafe wins! Dave quickly
snatches the Breath Saver and swallows it. The rest of us are laughing
hysterically (maybe you had to be there?) - Rafe reveals later that
had Dave handed it over, he would have tossed it into the weeds - check,
bet, check-raise, re-raise.
A hole or two later, Dave is still crushing the ball, and decides to
reveal his secret. Some video he saw mentioned that a lot of golfers'
problem is that they lock their right leg on the backswing, and if you
open up your back leg (i.e. point your toe more towards your backswing
area), you can't lock your leg. A comment or two about Dorf followed,
and then some general needling, and before you know it every bad shot
is the result of a locked leg. Rafe skulls a tee shot "uhh, your leg
was locked on that one", Phil misses a putt "I think you were leg-locked
on that one", Dave's hat falls off "it wouldn't have fallen off if you
hadn't locked your leg like that", etc. etc. ad nauseum. (Then before
you know it, *everything* the rest of the trip is a result of being
leg-locked "bad craps roll Dave, you locked your leg" "tough river card
Rafe, I think your leg was locked a little" ... etc. etc.) Final skin tally -
Dave 3, Lenny 3 (I won a double on #9), Tony 2, Phil 1, Rafe 0. Geez, it
really isn't Rafe's weekend, is it? (Did I mention that Rafe had his
pocket rockets get full only to be beaten by quads in Holdem on Thursday
night? At the Mirage - where there is no bad-beat).
Then the decision - play another 9 holes for $35, or go back and play
some poker. Rafe is leaving for poker and the rest are leaning golf, and
one-by-one (can you say 12 Angry Men?) the rest of us lean back to
poker, so we decide to head back.
In the parking lot, Dave insists (over everyone else's protests) that
he and Rafe were splitting their golf action (which they were), and
so he only had to give Rafe half his winnings. After 20 minutes of
amusing mathematical hi-jinks (I think he invented a brand new coordinate
system, replacing the polar coordinate system with Lambertian coordinates),
he comes to the conclusion that yes, he does own half of the action of
Rafe's losses as well (apparently he divided by zero somewhere along
the line when inventing Lambertian mathematics).
Bally's Pinball Action
----------------------
Sunday 4:00 PM
We got a seat pretty fast at the Mirage when we returned - Tony and
I sat down to the same 3-6 game. Tony was on my left, raising me
out of a lot of pots - I hate that, and Tony is a pretty liberal raiser
on the first two rounds. I was down about $40 at about 8:00 and we
had been talking about getting some dinner - I had a comp (Excellent!)
from the poker room, and the dealer had just changed, so it was a
good time to grab a bite. I could feel a tilt coming on (well, it was
pretty much already there), and I says "let's go to dinner". Tony
says "just one more hand - you're right before the blinds". "Humm, oh
all right, what can it hurt?" I look down at my cards the King and the
Jack of Spades. Well, what do we have here, the poker Gods are trying
to send me to dinner even, I call under-the-gun (there might have been
a raise too, I don't remember). The flop comes Ace spades, Jack of
something, and a non-spade rag. All I can see is the ace of spades
giving me the back-door nut flush draw and 2nd pair. So I check-raise.
What? Did I just do that? Well I'll find out if anybody is really on
a hand. And I do - I'm re-raised. Well I can call another 3 dollars
right? The turn comes rag. Uggh. Now I'm looking for any excuse to
stay in the pot (I did mention I was on tilt, didn't I?). Uhh, I could
make trip jacks. So I call a bet (it might have even been a raise that
I called - did I mention I was on tilt?) The river is nothing, and I
toss my cards into the muck disgustedly and walk away. Tony follows me
and says "what were you on?", and when I answer, he almost spits up on
himself. "I told you I was on tilt!"
I did get Presto dealt to me during that session as well, and promptly
screwed it up. I was in the small blind, and I was so excited, my
first reaction was "raise it up and knock people out to win the pot".
There's about 5 calls to me, so 6 or 7 go to the flop. Uhh, hey stupid,
what are you building the pot for? - now you'll never knock anyone out.
I didn't hit on the flop, and folded to a bet.
On the way to the Mirage buffet (for the third time in 4 days), we ran
into Phil, Rafe, and Dave playing, are you ready for this? ... Keno.
In the Keno lounge. With the old ladies. (I think Phil was just
trying to win his $10 bet with Rafe :-) Making smartalec comments the
whole time (I did mention it was Phil, Rafe, and Dave, right?).
They told the Keno bimbo that "this card is gonna be a big winner, but
we'll let the house out for five hundred dollars", but the house declined.
They got a giggle out of her anyway though. They did hit one sixty
dollar card. (Of course, they were leg-locked!) Dave promptly splits
the sixty into two pockets one for keno, one for craps "left pocket
keno, right pocket craps" hey Dave, where's the money? "left pocket
keno, right pocket craps".
We did discuss one new wager - anyone who can get any other player at
their table to react (just a facial expression will do) to a, how do
I say this delicately, a gaseous expulsion, gets 5 dollars from every
other player.
Untilt
------
Sunday 8:15 PM
I straightened my head out talking with Tony at dinner, forgetting
about poker for awhile. We did discuss post-flop raising. Tony
mentioned that he doesn't mind re-raising at all after the flop - the
bets are still cheap, and he likes to play back at people - you can
really put somebody on a hand when they re-re-raise, says he, gathering
information for $3. I filed that away.
I decide to be extremely tight when I return to the tables, and I want
to get that strong betting aura going again. I play maybe one hand
voluntarily in three rounds, then get AK to the right of the button.
I raise and win the blinds. A round or two later I get the same hand two
to the right of the button, and the same thing happens - two good hands
and I only paid for blinds two rounds. But I'm staying tight, and not
letting my dwindling stack get to me - finally I've bled away the $30
that remained before I went to dinner and I rebuy for $100.
And all of a sudden I put on my Rumple-man cape again. I hit a lot of hands,
and I've got that strong betting feeling going again, and that feeling of
Rumple-respect. For the next hour or two, I owned that table (at least I
felt that way).
After I've won a few pots, I get dealt Presto for the second time during
the weekend. On the button. Only one caller before me this time, so
raising might actually knock one or two out - 3 of us go to the flop.
Flop comes J94 rainbow - it's checked to me, and I bet, one folds, one
to go. The turn is a king, it's checked to me, and I bet. The other
guy folds, and I throw it down in front of Tony, "Presto". The cocky
attitude really risked pissing the other guy off, but hey, if I don't
show it to Tony, I don't get paid the 5 dollar Presto bonus. :-)
As I said, I hit a lot of hands and rarely had to showdown - I would
guess that 8 of the first 10 hands I won were not shown down - the
tight image was definitely there. I almost wish it wasn't, because
I pretty much always had the goods. I was dealt pocket rockets two
hands in a row (though I threw them away the first time to a straight).
On one hand, I raised Tony's bet heads-up after the flop, and he
re-raised, and I meekly folded. I had to, me leg was locked.
That play set up the following one. I'm one in front of the button
with A5 offsuit - there's two calls in front of me, and I call because
of my position. Tony raises from one of the blinds. I think I was
the only one to call (Tony had a pretty nice tight image too, and was
doing pretty good in this game.) The flop came T85. Tony bets, I
raise for the fun of it (hey, I've got some outs and a semi-Presto :-),
Tony re-raises (I should have figured that), so I re-re-raise (I don't
want Tony pushing me around :-), and hey he's right, the bets are
cheap at this point. Now we're gambling and having some fun! Tony
only calls. I've got him on a pocket pair, probably Qs or Ks. The turn
comes - 5. Oh my God, I'm actually going to get away with this ... Tony
checks, I bet, Tony thinks and folds. I schmengied him! (That's what
I mean by not showing down much - even my bluffs during this time were
turning into gold.) Tony finally left at 12:15, and I'm up for the
session a little over $100.
I had decided that I was going to get those extra 4 hours at the
Treasure Island between 1 and 4 (3-4 was a double hour), and take
a pull at that damn lottery ball, so I had about a half hour left. They
table changed us when Tony left.
If I thought I was had my Rumple-Man cape on for the previous 3 hours,
I had the Rumple-lederhosen with solid-steel crotch protection on now -
the next half hour was unbelievable. The other rushes I've had were
child's play next to this one - I won $180 in that half hour. I made a
full house on the turn, a nut flush twice, straight, two pairs - within
10 hands I had won 6 pots.
One of them was a call from the button with 96 offsuit - hey, play the
rush, right? I called all the way when I got the open-ended draw to 87J,
a 2 hit on the turn, I almost dropped before deciding I had pot odds to
draw (I was worried that a T would split the pot though), and hit the
T on the river.
On another I hit two pairs on the flop holding K5.
I did try for the gaseous expulsion bonus at one point, but the results
were disappointing - kind of like flopping bottom pair.
Presto?
-------
Monday 12:42 AM
At this point it's getting close to 12:45, and the blinds are one
away from me - well let me just see what these cards are, and I can
get up and walk away.
I slowly pull them up together, and see a 5, hmm, you don't think, do
you? Slowly, slowly, I roll my other card up ... slowly ... oh my God,
I've been dealt Presto on my last Holdem hand of the weekend. You know
what this means - there's going to be a huge pot and the poker Gods
want me to win it - thank you poker Gods!
Hmm, call or raise - well I better call so I don't eliminate anybody -
I want them all in when I suck out on this one - the small blind raises.
Am I worried?, hell no - the poker Gods will take care of everything.
Re-raise - hmm, no, that might eliminate some players. I call.
Here comes the flop - KJ9. Hmm I guess the poker Gods want me to have
to suck out - OK if I have to I will. Let me bet here and see who calls.
(I know I'm leg-locked, but I'm gonna swing the driver anyway.)
Call, fold, call, fold, raise - hmmm, re-raise? - no not even I have
that much faith in the poker Gods, so I'll just call. 3 players when
somebody drops.
OK, here comes the turn, you don't even have to tell me what it is, I
know already. It's gonna be a 5. I look at the card just to verify,
and of course I am right. Talk about your confidence builder - thank
you poker Gods - I was right, you do want me to have this pot.
Small blind bets, I raise, called, small blind reraises, I call, fold.
Down to two of us now. I'm pretty sure he has the QT for the straight,
and I'm pretty sure he thinks I have two pair, one way or another.
(There's just not a chance in hell that somebody can put me on 5s!)
River time - please pair, please pair, please pair .... King! This
is too much. Now of course he could be sitting on KJ, K9, K5, KK, JJ, or
99, but you know and I know that he doesn't have it - the poker Gods
have taken care of that. He bets, I raise, he calls - I turn it over ...
"Presto!", and he shows his QT to a shocked and gaping audience. The
whole table just sits there stunned (they had been amazed enough by
my rush before this hand), ... I just laugh and giggle - "racks please".
Treasure Island
---------------
Monday 1:00 AM
I made my way to Treasure Island, feeling stunned myself, as if I had seen
the hand of God literally come down and scoop that pot to me, but grinning
from ear to ear. I played over there in the 1-4 game and bilked the
poor tourists out of $105 in my 3 hours. These people were horrible -
nobody would raise with monster hands, and they would chase a long way.
1 guy whose name was probably Dan (sometimes you can just tell these
things) was the only other good player in the game, and we just kept
giving each other knowing glances while both cleaning up. He was on an
honest rush, and I started playing a little looser, noticing that it paid
off in the long run for him to see a card or two - hell you never had to
pay more than a buck for that first card ... unless Dan raised, and then
you knew to get out. My goal was to be up $105, so I would be up
$500 for the weekend - I was up $35 after one hour, $70 after two,
and $105 after 3. I could have clocked in every hour with a $35
win playing with these people. Anyway, after 3 hours I cashed out and
claimed my lotto pull. (I know "lotto" is a dirty word, rec.gamblers, I
wonder if I'll make any kill-files?) I was absolutely sure I was going
to hit the $500, but the guy screwed up and waited about 3 seconds after
I said pull, so all I got was a lousy 5 bucks. They really ought to let
you pull it yourself, but I'm sure some moron probably busted the machine
once.
Ready To Go
-----------
Monday 4:15 AM
Arrived back at the room and discovered that Dave wasn't there - it
turns out we matched up at 12 1/2 hours of sleep apiece for the 4
nights. Dave got there about 4:30 as I was writing in my notebook,
and spread out 26 hundred dollar bills on the bed as if he was showing
the new deck to a table. "I just turned $100 into $2600 playing
craps to come from $1100 down to $1400 up". "No you didn't" "Yes,
I did - my leg was really loose - it didn't lock until the last throw".
If you've ever seen Dave's Happy Smug Grin, you would know as I did
that he wasn't bluffing.
He then told me of the $400 in bad beats on 3 consecutive hands he took
at the 10-20 Holdem game before the craps run. That's $100 a minute
loss pace (he also mentioned that the table was all on tilt because
EVERYBODY was snapping each other off.)
We both showered, and met the other guys downstairs.
Final tallies for those with action on the participants:
Fish Results Sleep
1) Dave + $1400 12.5
2) Lenny + $ 510 12.5
3) Tony + $ 430 29.0
4) Phil + $ 25 22.0
5) Rafe - $ 700 21.0
(Hmm, doesn't seem like there's a correlation between sleep and results.)
We were all punch drunk from being so tired, and absolutely everything
struck us as funny. Rafe and I were in line for a Cinnamon Bun at
Cinnabon (delicious, I might add!), and he saw something called Vegas
Chips, some kind of potato chips. He pointed and said "Vegas Chips",
and in unison, we gave out a "Aii-yahhh", followed by 5 minutes of
giggling.
We caught our 6:50 AM flight, took Phil's car back to his place (he
was staying for Interop, remember?), and drove our cars to our respective
places of work. And got a lot done that day :')
We will hopefully do it all again soon.
Meanwhile, keep your leg loose ...
Lenny Augustine
P.S. Phil returned on Thursday from Interop ... sans panties.
Make Rafe $-690 :-)
---
Lenny Augustine "Dan Marino should die of gonorrhea and rot in
(lenny@aic.lockheed.com) hell ... would you like a cookie?" - Ray Finkle's mom
